Alright, W, you were right. You predicted it and I had the naive hope of actually thinking that you weren't. But as usual, you were. Maybe I'm just that boring to be with. Or irritating to be around. Or just being me, whatsoever that is plain offensive about that.
Is it a bloody crime to be fugly? Oh wait, I forgot. In this world, it IS. Yes I'm well aware that most of my friends to too polite to admit this lil truth to my face.
I should just go back to treating people, save my closest friends, as variables. I might just be happier then. Of course, I won't be very nice to be around, but hey, gosh, being nice has gotten me really far, hasn't it?
Hmm...maybe i'm just lonely. Missing the like whole 3 people who'd actually really care. Heh.
There's just that something in me that's holding me back. I can't for the life of me figure out what it is or even stop it. I'm just utterly sick of a whole lot of things and I'm just tired dammit. But even when I'm at my utter limit, there's just that something...some little thing in me which just refuses to let me give myself totally to W.
It just might be...hope. Heh.
Doesn't it all just sound so much like Pandora's box?
But well, I guess the only one who can get me out of this one is God...if he can be bothered to, that is. From past experience, that's about a 50/50 thing. The odds would be far lower if the situation weren't so crappy, believe me. He seems to have a tendency to actually screw up my life when things are going good, come to think of it. If there was any case for God wanting me to be miserable, that would be it, heh. But yeah, lets hope he will do something. Hope. That word again. But yeah...lets hope it happens...before there's nothing left to save.
Anyway...Go read Plant Shop of Horrors instead! Less negative! Its cute! Fun! Friendly! Well, not to bugs.
Is it a bloody crime to be fugly? Oh wait, I forgot. In this world, it IS. Yes I'm well aware that most of my friends to too polite to admit this lil truth to my face.
I should just go back to treating people, save my closest friends, as variables. I might just be happier then. Of course, I won't be very nice to be around, but hey, gosh, being nice has gotten me really far, hasn't it?
Hmm...maybe i'm just lonely. Missing the like whole 3 people who'd actually really care. Heh.
There's just that something in me that's holding me back. I can't for the life of me figure out what it is or even stop it. I'm just utterly sick of a whole lot of things and I'm just tired dammit. But even when I'm at my utter limit, there's just that something...some little thing in me which just refuses to let me give myself totally to W.
It just might be...hope. Heh.
Doesn't it all just sound so much like Pandora's box?
But well, I guess the only one who can get me out of this one is God...if he can be bothered to, that is. From past experience, that's about a 50/50 thing. The odds would be far lower if the situation weren't so crappy, believe me. He seems to have a tendency to actually screw up my life when things are going good, come to think of it. If there was any case for God wanting me to be miserable, that would be it, heh. But yeah, lets hope he will do something. Hope. That word again. But yeah...lets hope it happens...before there's nothing left to save.
Anyway...Go read Plant Shop of Horrors instead! Less negative! Its cute! Fun! Friendly! Well, not to bugs.
2 Comments:
At 8:48 PM,
K.S. Chong said…
Erm, it's all a matter of perception... Try this when something isn't as you hoped it to be: "It *could* be worse."
At 4:36 PM,
Anonymous said…
Hey 3W, you're not "fugly". Stop telling yourself that, dammit. I mean, geez, it's bad enough thinking other people see you that way..so you're just gonna agree with them?! (I dunno how W comes in as an antagonist, since technically he's part of you.)
Okay, so maybe there are some things you might want to identify and improve on if you think it'll help make you feel better about yourself, society...the works. You can change. Actually, you have to, lah, 'cause you can't make people change to accomodate you. That's reality: evolve or die. No point whinging about it, yes? :P
Hmm. I don't see how Pandora's box comes into the picture....
Oh yes, and...ditch God. Seriously, he can't possibly exist. And people spend way too much time trying to psychoanalyse Him and his 'ultimate motives'. Free will! You hold the key to your own destiny.
I'm kidding about the ditching Him part, of course. I expect it's much more comforting having someone to blame.
Anyway. Cheer up, dude! Have confidence in yourself! *thumbs up* I'll be seeing you Tuesday (lab, whee!).
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