Its interesting...that even though I've lost almost all faith in humanity...I've not gotten sick of it at all. Humanity in general still interests me. Is it any wonder that, my fav Star Trek characters are all misfits who try to understand the people they're forced to work with? As Data struggles to understand what it is to be human and Odo makes his observations on 'you solids', so I see the parallel in what I do in this world. As much as I may be genetically human, I am as far from the typical, general bulk of humanity as I can possibly be.
My standard word of caution here, unless you've been actively ostracised and made an outcast of AND has no one to support you during that time(ie someone who stood by you and did NOT just choose to sit on the fence), you can take all your "Yeah, I'm different like you too" crap and shove it. The only exception to this are the people who are ignored...forgotten...not noticed...people like Kao. Those guys would know how it feels like to a lesser degree...for although they may not be exposed to the true evil of humanity, they do know what it is like to be set apart from the general populace. Okay, perhaps this is a rather limited definition, and the exceptions to it will know who they are...so...yeah. Generally, I'm just whacking all of you who claim to be different from the general population BUT actually have your own clique of friends. Well, guess what? The general population is exactly like that. Hah!
Let me just remark here that I do take pride in my work...and as such...I don't believe that non-quality crap should be rewarded. Yes, I may be LAZY, but anything but quality crap from me should never be rewarded by anything more than a 'B'. I take my crap seriously. Why? Because I see it as a proof of my thinking capability.
Anyway...
I used to be someone who liked people, liked being around, liked the interraction between people...etc. Used to. That's the key point. Actually, I still do like the interraction between people...only now I don't like being around certain people...and thus don't like certain people. I know what its like to be used...and I know what its like to be alone...with a whole bunch of scum making life miserable for me...and no one to stand by me(take me side). Oh go ahead, sit on the fence. It is what makes you feel better, right? Take the neutral stance. It is safer for you, after all. If I was in the 'wrong' that would be one thing...but in this case, I wasn't. Friends? Nope, at that time, I was alone alright. Except maybe Petey, who stood up for me that one time...which I doubt I'll ever forget.
There's that interesting point...if someone chops off your arm, you may eventually forgive that person...but for now, divine intervention aside, you've lost that arm and will never have it again. I dare say its the same with me...perhaps I will one day forgive all the scum who have made me suffer so...but I'm who I am now.
But I don't hate people. Can't really. I CAN still be disgusted and annoyed with them though. And yes, people are generally not worth it. I'm willing to bet that 99% of the time, the person isn't worth it. But that 1% of the time remains...and the best example of that in my life, for now that is, is Kao.
I'll carry on later I guess...heh...
My standard word of caution here, unless you've been actively ostracised and made an outcast of AND has no one to support you during that time(ie someone who stood by you and did NOT just choose to sit on the fence), you can take all your "Yeah, I'm different like you too" crap and shove it. The only exception to this are the people who are ignored...forgotten...not noticed...people like Kao. Those guys would know how it feels like to a lesser degree...for although they may not be exposed to the true evil of humanity, they do know what it is like to be set apart from the general populace. Okay, perhaps this is a rather limited definition, and the exceptions to it will know who they are...so...yeah. Generally, I'm just whacking all of you who claim to be different from the general population BUT actually have your own clique of friends. Well, guess what? The general population is exactly like that. Hah!
Let me just remark here that I do take pride in my work...and as such...I don't believe that non-quality crap should be rewarded. Yes, I may be LAZY, but anything but quality crap from me should never be rewarded by anything more than a 'B'. I take my crap seriously. Why? Because I see it as a proof of my thinking capability.
Anyway...
I used to be someone who liked people, liked being around, liked the interraction between people...etc. Used to. That's the key point. Actually, I still do like the interraction between people...only now I don't like being around certain people...and thus don't like certain people. I know what its like to be used...and I know what its like to be alone...with a whole bunch of scum making life miserable for me...and no one to stand by me(take me side). Oh go ahead, sit on the fence. It is what makes you feel better, right? Take the neutral stance. It is safer for you, after all. If I was in the 'wrong' that would be one thing...but in this case, I wasn't. Friends? Nope, at that time, I was alone alright. Except maybe Petey, who stood up for me that one time...which I doubt I'll ever forget.
There's that interesting point...if someone chops off your arm, you may eventually forgive that person...but for now, divine intervention aside, you've lost that arm and will never have it again. I dare say its the same with me...perhaps I will one day forgive all the scum who have made me suffer so...but I'm who I am now.
But I don't hate people. Can't really. I CAN still be disgusted and annoyed with them though. And yes, people are generally not worth it. I'm willing to bet that 99% of the time, the person isn't worth it. But that 1% of the time remains...and the best example of that in my life, for now that is, is Kao.
I'll carry on later I guess...heh...

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