Constantly on my mind...
Email can't replace a conversation, even one on msn. Interesting how there are people that are afraid it can. Speaking of which, I'm awaiting a very special email right now. ^^
To leave a place where one has spent a good many years of their life. In my case, since I'm not actually leaving the place itself. My Grandfather's house has been torn down and is to arise again in the form of a 3-floored monstrosity, just like virtually every other house around it. It'll never be the same again. Though the physical location is still there...I do feel like I've left it, never to return. Its funny in a way...I don't really have any real feeling of loss or sadness...nor one of joy either. There's just this feeling...that the old house is gone now, consigned to the memories of the past.

The Legacy is also probably due for a change in crew. People come and go and the Legacy isn't a ship for those who have found their way. People find their loves in the form of people or commitments...of material things or spiritual faith. These people have found their way. The Legacy is a ship of the lost. Most of its crew...or should I say then-crew, shouldn't be part of it now. Hence now all is as it should be. I am alone, save one or two people who would choose to stay with me aboard this ship of solitude. Which is a good thing I guess. They say you hurt the ones you care for the most...and given me...heh...I probably do that a lot. Ah well...

Its late and I'm rambling. So...I should stop, hahaha...

Wow...its been a long time since my last real blog update, hasn't it? I wonder if anyone ever checks this lil thing anymore.

Anyway...I now have plushie microbes!! Yay!!! Muahahahaha...they're soooo cute!! Dang I wish I had a digicam. Oh well.

Its funny...I mean...its been a long time since I last had to call on W...or use his abilities for that matter. Heck, I didn't even have to do it for the exams this time round...though I can't say I'm going to do very well. Heh.

All in all, life seems to be looking up. The key word here being 'seems'. After all I've been through, it just seems way, way too easy for things to be falling into place now. Furthermore, W's been giving me warnings off and on, which till now I've just dismissed as paranoia. However...

I've just noticed a 'theme' if you will. Circumstances seem to have come together to drill it into my head that I'm not living up to everyone's expectations of me. Who knows, I might not be living up to Kao's expectations of me either, but he's not the sort to tell me that kind of thing. Normally...I wouldn't give a damn. After all, I've been living the way I am...being me...for the past 22 years. Most of the adults I've come into contact with have been pestering me about not meeting their petty expectations. Well, some weren't that petty...I can understand the teachers wanting me to score in school. After all, their heads are on the line if they can't get their supposedly brainy kids to perform. Other expectations have been really petty though. Like my eating habits. I'm sick and tired of hearing about how my brother is a joy to be with at the dinner table because he can eat and eat and eat. Or rather...I'm sick and tired of hearing how I should be more like that. Baka. And I'll smile if I want to smile. I can understand if I was working in retail, but how the heck can you fault a person for not smiling on his own time. I'm not a puppet. But even so...I normally wouldn't care. I'm me, take it or leave it.

But now...it looks like it might matter after all...what someone else thinks of me. *sigh* Ah well...there are no free lunches in this world, not for me at least. I don't want to have to bring out W again...not after all this time. Project Union has been going well...slow, but good. Heh...what an irony. What a mess.

Obviously, I'm not about to quit fighting. That's no my style...or W's for that matter. However...his warning are getting more frequent...and they're adding up too. Its worrying.

Ah well...I'm obviously not in the right state of mind to even be blogging...heh...